Food Choices

So the first month of my journey I decided to not focus on what I was eating.  I was going to cut out the obvious bad stuff - soda pop, fast food, sugar, etc.  However I still ate potato chips, and other various bad stuff like pancakes and syrup.  After really looking at my Food Journal, I've noticed that I have become very relaxed in my eating. At first it was pretty good, I was eating three meals a day and had a couple of snacks in-between.  Now I'm eating a lot more than I should be. I'm hungry a lot.  Or at least I think I'm hungry.  It's hard to tell.  I've trained my body over the years to just want food all the time.

I've been successful at getting a proper workout in my daily routine.  This almost seems pointless though if I'm going to continue to eat more than I get rid of through working out.  It's not pointless.  I've worked hard to get this habit going and I'm very proud of myself for being successful.  However, I think that if I focused more on my eating I would see the inches drop faster.  It seems if I continue to eat the way I am it will cancel out all of my hard work establishing the desire to workout.

So I've decided now is the time to focus on my eating and the foods I consume.  Some people may be up in arms but I've decided to do Atkins (again...right mom?).  It works for me.  It can be a difficult lifestyle but that's only if you let it be difficult.  Working out is difficult but I've managed to make it a daily routine and something that I look forward too.

Atkins can be a very healthy option.  My parents have been doing the Atkins lifestyle for many years and they are in the best shape of their lives.  If the lifestyle is done correctly it is very beneficial.  It is not a no-carb lifestyle, it is a low-carb lifestyle.  It isn't bad for you...if it's done CORRECTLY.  I cannot stress that enough.  So many people have pre-conceived notions of this lifestyle.  If they would just read the book then they would learn the benefits.  Seriously, if the options are instead of white pasta you have zucchini?  How is that not healthy?  You get all of your carbs through vegetables, nuts, etc.

Atkins is a process.  There are stages to it.

Stage 1 - Induction

• This process lasts 2 weeks.  It's the hardest phase of them all.
• You are allowed 20 net carbs a day
• Your daily carb intake will be from proteins, healthy fats, & vegetables

Stage 2 - OWL (or Ongoing Weight loss)

• This phase lets you start adding more types of food and more carbs back into your diet
• You will still lose weight but it will slow down a bit
• You get to up your carb intake to 25-45 grams a day (depending on if you start to gain weight back)
• Your daily carb intake will be from proteins, healthy fats, vegetables, nuts, & berries

Stage 3 - Pre-Maintenance

• You move to this phase when you are within 10 lbs. or your goal weight
• Basically you keep adding your daily carb intake, keep losing weight, and keep gaining control
• You get to up your carb intake to 50-70 grams a day
• Your daily carb intake will be from proteins, healthy fats, vegetables, nuts, berries, fruits, legumes, breads, and grains

Stage 4 - Lifetime Maintenance

• You're at your goal weight.  You know exactly how much and what kinds of foods you can eat to maintain your weight.
• You can up your carb intake to 75+ grams a day!
• Your daily carb intake will be from proteins, healthy fats, vegetables, nuts, berries, fruits, legumes, breads, and grains

The whole point of this lifestyle is to help you pinpoint what foods out there and how much of it causes you to gain weight.  Eventually some people are able to have pasta and potatoes, etc. it's all about finding out what causes you to gain.  It's a great lifestyle but it takes patience.  As with any change in eating or dieting if you will, there are plateau days.  I don't like to call it dieting because you can't just do Atkins, and once you get to your goal you can't go back to eating like you did before.  It's a lifestyle change.  You have to stick with it.

I highly suggest if you're interested to buy the book and read it.  However only read the 2002 version of the book!!! That book was actually written by Dr. Atkins himself (click here to go to Amazon to buy book if you want).  The other versions were written by the company and all they're about is selling product.  Any version after 2002 is not about the actual lifestyle.  There are things in those books that Dr. Atkins did not originally have.  Again the company is all about selling product.  For example, the company says you can have the Atkins Bars in all phases but the ingredients in those bars consist of different kinds of nuts.  You aren't allowed to have nuts until phase 2 of Atkins.  

I'm rambling now.  I need to go shopping.  I have to focus on the eating now.  I need to change my food choices into healthier options.  I feel Atkins is the way to go.  Wish me luck, and God give me the patience to stick to it this time!

Pick Me Up

Always move forward...The past is what made you...don't let it break you.

Well, yesterday was a roller-coaster of emotions.  My self-esteem took a big hit.  I'm still trying to repair it.  I have found that doing this big lifestyle change has made me stronger yet at the same time very very fragile.  It's hard to explain it.  Although yesterday pretty much stank, I was able to show myself what strengths I have gained.  Normally when my self-esteem is dragging in the mud and I feel like I'm just not good enough all I would do is eat.  I would grab the most unhealthy food out there and sit in front of the TV and eat, eat, eat.  I would go out of my way to somehow get to a fast food joint to order their worst meal in it's biggest size and eat, eat, eat.  I didn't do that yesterday.  

Instead I crocheted 2 (yeah count 'em) baby blankets.  I kept my hands busy.  You can't eat and crochet at the same time.  That night at Studio Zumba my instructor/coach, Tricia Truax, was having her big comeback class.  So I waited until I could get to that class.  I crocheted, played with the kids, and waited....

I made it to the class, put on my new shoes, and danced my sorrows away.  Tricia has these awesome moves in a couple of the routines that consisted of punching the air.  I punched the air with all my might.  That class was awesome.  I kept up as best I could.  My emotions were running all over the place.  At times I was laughing, other times I was crying.  I was just in a weird place emotionally and this workout gave me the pick me up that I needed.  I walked away after the class feeling much better.

After watching myself handle this situation, it makes me so glad to know how much I have changed.  I would damage myself so much in the past.  I would have a "who cares" attitude.  Well, guess what? I care.  I care about myself too much this time to mess it up just because something upset me.  We all have our ups and downs.  My down was pretty low yesterday.  What matters is how we handle it.  I thank God that I have found the strength to keep fighting for myself.  I do care, I do matter.  I've worked too hard to mess this up.

Sigh.....

Ever feel like this?

Talk about your mood swings.  Through various events that I do not want to go into online this is exactly how I feel right now.  You work so hard but sometimes it just isn't enough...

It's my fault.  I shouldn't have let this happen.  I'm trying to fix it though.  It's a slow process.  Have patience with me.  I'm sorry I let it get so bad.

Sorry for the very vague post.  I will not get into the details.  I just need to vent a little.  This is how I feel right now.  I need to not let it hurt my progress.  I'm an emotional eater.  I will not turn to food for comfort.  I will not eat something that will make things worse than they already are.

Again I apologize for this post.  But this is what this blog is for.  I use it to express my highs and lows.  This helps me stay on track.  This journey is for me.   This is what I need to remind myself of.  This is about me.


UPDATE:
Ok I know this post is random. It helped me though. I feel much better. Sometimes you just have to vent. Just breathe.

One Month!!!

This is how I feel! haha!

Boom!  I hit the one month mark! I feel very accomplished.  I've done a lot in this first month.  I've learned to listen to my body to avoid serious injury.  I was not able to avoid injury entirely but at least it's not something serious.  I met Beto Perez, the creator of Zumba and I worked out with him...at least for part of it before the sun took over me.  I feel that I have gotten into the habit of working out everyday.  The last couple of days I haven't worked out because of my foot injury and I have felt sooo fidgety.  All I want to do is workout...take a walk, do some Zumba, anything!  I need to wait though.  I have to let my feet heal.

In this last month I stopped eating fast food and overly sugared foods and drinks.  I can no longer stand drinking anything other than water.  Even sugar-free lemonade tastes nasty to me.  I did have some fast food during this last month but it tasted awful and I felt gross after eating it.  I think that it was a good lesson learned though.  I will not be eating any fast food anytime soon.  I went to a cook out today and I brought cookies.  They looked really good last night when I bought them but when we had them out today at the cookout I had absolutely no desire to eat one.  Also Saturday night after the big Zumba Jam with Beto, my crew and I went out to eat.  One of the girls was celebrating her birthday and the restaurant gave her a big brownie and some ice cream.  I had one small bite of the brownie and I was done.  It was just way too sweet.  I think I've finally kicked my sugar tooth.

I posted a picture update (click here!).  I don't see a lot of difference.  I think there is a little difference but I don't know if it's because there is a difference or if I'm trying to convince myself that there is a difference.  I know I didn't loose a lot of weight this last month.  I kind of already planned on that.  I wanted to spend this month focusing on the mental part of this journey.  I needed to make sure I worked out everyday and changed my thinking about food and exercise.  I really do believe I've succeeded in the mental changes.

In the months to come I'm going to focus more on my food choices.  I've been very happy not being overly careful about my food because I haven't been feeling deprived.  However, I think it will be good for me.  Not only will it speed up the weight loss but it will help me make better decisions. There have been times during this last month I would eat potato chips or something to that effect because I told myself it didn't matter since I wasn't watching what I was eating.  If I become more focused on my eating then I would make better decisions.

All in all I believe that my first month has been successful.  I'm feeling more energized and more positive everyday.  The next step I need to take is to watch what I eat more closely.  I'm excited to see what the next month has to bring.  Hopefully some actual weight loss and visible physical changes.  That all depends on me.  I need to stay focused and keep working on it.  I need to watch what I eat, workout everyday, and stay positive! I can do this.

Writer's Block

I'm having a bit of writer's block today.  I'm not sure what to write about.  I'm still dwelling on how awesome yesterday was. It was much fun and I can't wait to do it again.  I hope Beto comes back to the area again soon.  I need to work on my stamina still.  I think my foot issues are being cause by my achilles tendon being too stiff.  I have a bunch of stretches that I do and they are really helping.  I think I'll be ready to workout again on Monday, maybe Tuesday.  Tomorrow marks one month and photo updates!!

BETOOOOOO!!!

My crew!

Saturday I had the privilege to go to a Zumba Jam with none other than the creator of Zumba, Beto Perez.  It was so much fun.  I went with an awesome group of gals.  Tricia Truax was the leader and she got to get up on stage and do 2 songs as well.  It was amazing to watch her, she has so much energy.  Beto was also awesome!  It was so much fun to watch him live.  I watch the DVD's numerous times a week.  Zumba has been in my life since 2006.  It was kind of surreal seeing him live.  It was kind of like seeing a  celebrity!  It was such an opportunity.

We got there kind of early to get a good spot and because our instructor needed to be there at a certain time to do her songs.  So we stood in the heat for quite a while.  I was really starting to feel the heat.  We were into the 3rd song with Beto when I really started to feel sick.  I had heard somewhere that dizziness and nausea are signs of heat stroke.  I don't know if that's true but I'm pretty sure I've heard that somewhere.  My left foot was starting to act up again as well.  My calves started to cramp which really leads me to believe my foot issue is caused by my Achilles being too tight....I need to STRETCH.  So I listened to my body and got some ice water and sat in the shade until I started to feel better.  I was bummed that I couldn't keep up.  I really wanted to but I feel that I made the better decision.  Injury and/or  heat stroke are not desirables that's for sure.  So I took a lot of pictures and drank water and got better.

My friend Shelby, Beto, and me

She's on the Exhilarate DVD!

I think if it wasn't so hot out and if we weren't standing in the heat for so long it wouldn't have been as bad.  Either way it was amazing.  Not only was Beto there but he brought a couple of gals with him that are also on the DVD's that I workout to every week.  That was pretty awesome to see them live as well.

It was a long but really fun day.  I did not do as well as I had hoped.  There were a lot of things working against me though.  The key is that I had fun.  My drive to succeed is still there.  My love of Zumba is still strong.  Hopefully next time Beto is in town or at least the next (if ever) I see him live, I will be much healthier and able to keep up.  I'll make him proud!


A small taste of what we did today.  Tricia (my instructor) is the one in the pink headband.  She was amazing and had a ton of energy even in the heat.  Oh yeah, and she just had a baby...She's flippin' amazing!

The Inevitable

Well it's happened...Injury...that dreaded word...

I have this heel pain and I think it might be Plantar Fasciitis.  I'm not positive though.  After doing some research it seems that that is an over diagnosed injury.  Either way my left heel is having some issues.  When I first wake up in the morning it hurts to put pressure on it.  It's the same if I stand up after resting.   After walking on it for a while the pain goes away.

Argh.  This frustrates me.  If it continues it can lead to worse things.  I need to rest it.  I'm not going to workout at all today, not even my beloved walk during my lunch break.  It needs to rest.  I'm going to Zumba with Beto on Saturday.  Hopefully a full days rest will help.  Either way injury can be so detrimental in trying to become healthy.

This injury can be caused by a lot of things.  Sometimes it's being overweight.  I don't think that was the cause because I've been overweight for  a while and never had this issue.  Another possible cause is exercising.  My body isn't used to me walking so much.  It's been a long time since I've walked this much.  Another cause could be bad shoes.  I just bought some new shoes that feel great.  I've been working out in bad shoes though for a long time and my new shoes are only a couple of days old.  I also did Zumba in my running shoes which can be bad.  The running shoes are too heavy and can cause a lot of traction which is bad for the heel, knees, and hips.  I also have a really high arch and if that arch doesn't get enough support injury can happen.

Today I need to rest, stretch and ice my foot.  Hopefully that helps.  Fingers crossed this doesn't continue for a long time.  I'm doing so well but I don't want to permanently injure myself.  If it gets really bad I will have to start taking some kind of shot to alleviate the pain (according to some of my research...).  That's just downright expensive; I want to workout but I can't.  A little rest won't hurt me as much as overworking and injured food.  At least that's what I need to tell myself.

Here are a few ways to alleviate the pain:

1. Don't get old! OK, that's not exactly practical for most of us, but keeping the body fit by regular walking and gentle weight-bearing exercise is an excellent way of maintaining good foot health.
2. Maintain a sensible weight. It is often the overweight who suffer from plantar fasciitis. It's fairly obvious when you think about it - the more weight you are carrying on your feet, the more they are likely to suffer as the years go by.
3. Don't be over-athletic. As with many injuries, including ligament strains and achilles tendon tears, it is the athlete who suffers most because he/she makes huge demands on the limbs and appendages. Being a competitive top-level athlete may have its advantages but sports injuries are so-called because it is sportsmen who encounter them more often than those who indulge in gentle exercise. If you have a talent and you must compete, fair enough - be as careful as you can.
4. Warm up properly before exercise and cool down afterwards. The importance of stretches cannot be over-emphasised. Tight calf muscles can contribute to heel pain, as the achilles tendon stretches all the way up into the calf, and flexibility in this whole area, right down to the plantar fascia, is highly desirable.
5. Wear supportive shoes - always - preferably with good arch supports. Plantar fasciitis sufferers are often those born with "high arches". The arch tends to sag in later life, especially if the feet are carrying a heavy load, and excessive pulling of the plantar fascia can result, causing severe pain upon rising. This condition is sometimes called "Fallen Arches" for this reason.
6. Although high arches can be a contributing factor, low arches are as well. When a foot flattens out too much it puts tremendous strain on the plantar fascial ligament, particularly where it attaches into the heel bone. Keep in mind that plantar fasciitis is not just limited to the heel; it can occur mid arch as well.
7. Don't be blase about heel pain. Once it starts it can get worse - and when it gets worse it can be excruciating, so deal with the problem immediately. The longer you leave it, the harder it will be to cure, so don't delay.
8. Stretch your feet before getting out of bed in the morning, or do some gentle calf and achilles stretches on, or soon after, rising. This may help control plantar fasciitis in its initial stages.
9. Rest, preferably with your feet elevated. Of course it is difficult to avoid basic walking from A to B, but do not do anything as strenuous as running or walking long distances when your feet are sensitive.
10. Don't be lulled into thinking you have defeated the pain forever. If you have rested sufficiently so the pain seems to have gone away, don't go plunging yourself into exercise with the renewed vigor you may feel. Start off slowly by doing some gentle walking or jogging, and increase the intensity or distance very gently day by day or week by week
11. Try orthotics. Some find it helpful to wear special insoles which support the arch of the foot. This can be trial and error, even with specially made orthotics, and can cost a good deal of money in the long run. However, if you get a good set made, they can provide relief almost immediately, and help your feet heal in the end. Be sure to wear them at all times - even in your bedroom slippers.
12. See a foot care specialist. If you are very prone to plantar fasciitis or have risk factors (super-athleticism, obesity or mature years) you may find it worthwhile to check out some of the options available through a podiatrist.

Source: http://www.wikihow.com/Avoid-Heel-Pain-and-Plantar-Fasciitis

Support

Here we are in 8th grade

I have a friend.  We go way back.  We went to school together for a couple of years and we were very close.  I considered her my bestie at the time.  After 8th grade she moved away.  We drifted apart.  It happens.  We were kids and this was before social networking and cell phones (way to age myself right?).  

Well, thanks to social networking (aka Facebook) we reconnected so many years later.  We had our own lives, we went to different colleges, we had husbands, we had kids.  Through Facebook we are able to rekindle that friendship that we had drifted from so long ago.  It's been awesome catching up and seeing where she is now.  She is a great mom who has beautiful children, and her husband sounds pretty awesome too.

The reason I bring her up is because she has her own blog: The Long Weigh Down. In this blog I discovered that she is going through the exact same struggles that I am currently dealing with. I'm not sure how much I weight honestly but I believe we're in the same ballpark.  I love reading her posts because it gives me so much support with my own struggles on this journey to a healthier me.  She has these struggles that I also face, and her solutions to these problems are exactly what I need.  She has also found a love for Zumba.  It's so much fun to read her posts to see how she is doing.  It is great encouragement to me to watch her succeed.  Watching her be successful in her journey makes me want to be successful in my own that much more.

Isn't she pretty?

I also know she reads my blog everyday.  That too is a great source of support.  It keeps me up to date with my blog.  I know at least one person reads it.  So I also feel I can't fail because I don't want to let her down.

It's amazing how much time has passed since we last saw each other.  Yet she is such a help to me.  She gives me so much support and drive to keep pushing.  It's almost like we're in this together.  I need to succeed for myself and for her.  Does that sound weird?  Probably.  Either way even though we live far apart and may not be as close as we used to be, she is very important to me.  She has helped me so much through this journey.  I look forward to reading her posts all the time.  I hope she gets as much from my blog as I do from hers.   Follow her blog, she is awesome!  Let's give her the support that she gives me!  Thanks you so much for helping feel I am not alone in this struggle.  You're awesome and your are doing so amazing! Keep it up and stay strong!

3 Days and Counting!

Beto, the creator of Zumba

 This Saturday I will be going to Pittsburgh to a live Zumba event where none other than the creator of the program, Beto Perez, will be there!  I’m so excited.  I bought my first Zumba workout videos roughly around 2006, maybe ’07.  It was a lot of fun but I was easily distracted so naturally I didn’t stick to the workout.  After having those VHS tapes sitting around my house for a few years I decided to sell the tapes at a used bookstore.

So time passed and I gained weight.  I tried a few different things here and there (running, gym memberships, P90x, etc) but nothing stuck.  Rather I never let anything stick.  This time around I found a studio in town that has live Zumba classes.  I hate working out in front of people but I decided to suck it up and go to a class and try it out again.  The instructor, Tricia, was sooooo much fun!  She had such a fire and passion for what she does.  It literally lit a fire in me to do try Zumba again.

So I bought a Wii and the Zumba Wii game.  It was fun but it really didn’t push me.  I tried going to more classes but it was a hard finding time to get to a live class.  I work full-time, the Mr. works full-time, I have children.  It’s hard fitting in a class.  So since the Wii wasn’t really doing anything for me, I decided to purchase the Zumba Exhilarate DVD’s.  If you read any of my past posts or my workout journal, I hit the ground running with the Zumba DVD’s.  They are a lot of fun, hard, but fun.  Plus I’ve managed to fit the workouts in my daily routine! Yay!

Yesterday I went back to the studio for a live class for the first time in about a year.  It was a ton of fun!  I struggled.  It was hard to keep up with everyone.  I know the steps but I just don’t seem to move fast enough.  I put my all into it.  I actually felt my abs hurting.  I haven’t felt abdominal muscles in 10 years.  All my kids have been c-sections so honestly there was never a reason to use my abs in the past few years.  I hope to be able to make it to a live class once a week.  The DVD’s are great but the live classes push me that much more.

So Saturday.  Yes I am excited.  I am also terrified.  There are going to be at least 800 people there and I really really hope I’m not the biggest most out of shape person there.  I know that’s awful to say but when you’re at this level of unhealthy you develop some insecurities.  This would make for a perfect excuse to not go.  I know I won’t be able to keep up.  I know I will take a lot of breaks for water and to catch my breath.  I know I will feel awkward and self-conscious.  There are so many reasons I don’t want to do this.  However, this is a chance of a lifetime.  I have such a strong love for Zumba and my history with the program goes way back.  I’ve done it for just under a month now and I haven’t tired of it.  How many chances will I get to do Zumba live with the creator?  I don’t know if I’ll meet him but it will still be awesome to see him live.  So I am going to suck it up.  I will be terrified but having a blast all at the same time.  3 days! Betoooooooo!

 

Teach Them While They're Young

Children learn everything from their parents and the role models in their lives.  Some people don't give kids enough credit...they're much smarter than you think.  They watch your every move and listen to every word that comes out of your mouth.  This is why it's very important to watch what you say and do in front of children.  They will imitate your action.   This is how they learn right from wrong, what to say and what not to say.  This is how they learn their manners or lack there of depending on your parenting ways. Whatever you do your children will do.  Whoever you hang out with, your children will learn from them as well.  You have to be so careful if you want your children to grow up to be good people.

Over the years I gave into horrible habits.  I ate awful food all the time.  I was never active.  I was in a very unhealthy state of life and it was getting worse with each child I was having.  Pregnancy was my excuse to do nothing and to eat whatever I wanted.  So as you can imagine I gained more and more with each child.

The worst part about it, besides slowly killing myself with junk, was that my kids started to pick up on all these bad habits.  My almost 3 year old has the biggest sweet tooth you'll ever find.  My eldest only wants to eat chips and ramen noodles.  My youngest, well she'll eat anything..she's like a goat.  It starts with me though.  If all I eat is junk then that's what is in the house and that's what my kids become accustomed to eating.  If I'm eating well all that's in the house is good food, fruits, and veggies.  Believe it or not my kids enjoy eating the healthy stuff.  It's not their preferred food but if the bad stuff isn't even in the house they don't seem to mind.  Out of site, out of mind.

Over these past 4 weeks I've been getting into the habit of working out everyday.  I'm starting to notice that my children are picking up on this awesome habit.  They too want to be active.  It all has to do with the fact that they now see that mom makes time to workout.  I also explain to them why I'm working out.  The eldest is really starting to understand why it's important to be active.  She asks me everyday if she can do her workout.  That could be anywhere from running around outside, climbing trees, or doing Zumba on the Wii or with me.  Whatever my eldest is doing the two younger ones follow.  Today all three of them did a pretty solid 20 minute Zumba workout.  Grant it they took a lot of breaks but it was still pretty impressive that they stuck to it that long.  At one point I even told them lets pause it so we can eat lunch (I wasn't working out it was just them).  My eldest told me "not yet, I'm not finished with my workout".  This made me proud.  Proud that she is starting to understand that being active is healthy.  Proud that I'm finally starting to teach them some good habits.

If this kind of lifestyle is introduced to a child at this young of age, the chances of it sticking with them for the rest of their lives are pretty darn good.  It's very rewarding to see these changes taking place in their lives and that they are embracing it.  Being healthy is so important for myself but also for the people around me.  I hope that I can continue to be a good example to my children.  They learn from what I do.  We are all getting healthy and active.

On the 7th Day He Rested

God blessed the seventh day and made it holy, because on it he
rested from all the work he had done in creation.

                                                                                        ~ Genesis 2:1

Based on what happened last Monday and my mental breakdown or breakthrough?? I've decided to make Sundays a real and true rest day.  I think I put too much pressure on myself to make sure I worked out every single day of the week.  So when I had that day where I physically couldn't finish my workout I really disappointed myself.  Letting myself get into such a mental state with myself can not be healthy.  Plus it really freaked out the family when I had my little breakdown.

There are some other reasons why I decided to turn Sunday into an actual rest day.  First of all it's really difficult to make sure you fit in Church, a 1 hour workout, and various other activities all before I have to be at work.  Secondly, myself and the Mr. work so much during the week that Sunday is really the only day we all have to spend a decent amount of time together before I have to go to work.  It's very frustrating to all of us if I take what little time we have together away so I can workout.  If I do workout on Sunday I'm the one who feels guilty.  None of the family makes me feel bad for wanting to workout, they are very supportive.   Either way Sunday is our Family day (at least before I go into work) and it's rough not being able to spend as much time as possible with the family because of working out.

So Sunday I did not workout intensely.  I took a nice 1 mile walk during my lunch break.  I felt that that would suffice.  I spent a lovely day with my family and then had a nice day at work.  Monday rolled around and I jumped right back into my intense workout with Zumba Toned.  It was an awesome workout.  I felt I took less breaks than usual.  I still struggled but I am happy with the effort that I put into it.  I think having a real rest day has definitely helped; I also think it will be very beneficial in the weeks to come.  So yeah I'm going to listen to God's advice and rest on the 7th day.  He does know what He's doing so it's pretty sound advice.  He rested on the 7th day after He created the world, I'm going to rest on the 7th day after trying to create a better me.  Lord give me strength.

Hey I put some new shoes on...

...And suddenly everything's right.

Today I gave myself a little treat.  I bought a new pair of shoes!  They are pretty sweet.  They offer support that I don't believe I've ever gotten before.  It's been years since I got new shoes.  Hopefully these babies last for a while.  They're white with some sliver and blue in them.  That color scheme is my favorite.  I saved up the money for my shoes through my Etsy shop sales (Ceci's Crochet Corner) <-- shameless plug I know :)

Aren't they pretty?

Recently my feet were really starting to hurt.  I was not wearing the proper shoes at all.  I couldn't even walk barefoot without feeling pain because of how tender the heels had become from the lack of padding and support.  I also know my feet tent to lean towards the inside when I walk and these news shoes help straighten that out.  Another thing that needed to be addressed was my high arch.  The shoes I have been wearing had absolutely no support for my high arches.  Not wearing the right shoes when you workout or walk can be so damaging.  Hopefully with these nice new shoes I will avoid that!

Now I am going to break them in and crochet a few hats to help pay for them.  New shoes are so exciting!

3 Weeks!!!!

What? Three weeks already?!?  I'm almost at the one month mark.  I can't believe it.  It's been a heck of a rollercoaster that's for sure.  Week 3 had it's ups and downs to say the least.  Monday was a heck of a day, but I was able to climb out of the funk and get back on track.  I learned a lot of things about myself this week.  It's amazing what can happen in such a short amount of time.  Here are some of the things I've learned:

1. I am terrified of failing.  If I do not workout then I'm not going to feel right the whole day.
• I'm tired of restarting this journey over and over and over.  This time I really and truly want to make this stick.  I will make this stick.  Not being able to workout one day out of the week and the emotional craziness that was a result shows that I need to make sure I stay active.
2. I am no longer self-concious when I work out.  In the past I always felt so silly working out in front of him.  Now I don't feel like that at all.  Which is good because now he is no longer my excuse to avoid a workout!
• I never used to workout if the Mr. was home.  I know when I workout it is not the most attractive vision.... Large woman shaking her stuff does not equal a pretty site.  So I always used the excuse that I wasn't going to workout because I didn't want him to see me.  I know it's silly but that's what I thought.  Now I don't care.  I workout no matter what.  He could be in the room while I use the television and it's no big deal.
3. I am over eating any kind of fast food. 
• It's gross and I don't miss it.  It's not worth eating that junk.  Same thing goes for anything other than water.  I just can't drink anything else.  It tastes so gross.
4. My desire for success is huge.  There are moments when I think I don't want to work out but I have managed to surpress that everyday.
• It's not just something I'm doing.  I can feel a difference in myself.  Not nessecarily visually but mentally for sure!  I'm not just going through the motions.  I have the urge to be active everyday. 
5. I need to listen to my body.  Monday was proof that my body will let me know what I need to do to succeed.
• As much as I want to make sure I workout everyday if my body says otherwise I need to listen.  The last thing I want is an injury.  I also don't want to get burnt out.  That's how I have never succeeded before because I either give up on eating right or I'm working out too much too fast, and my body fights back.

I was going to wait until the end of week 4 to reward myself but my reward was going to be new sneakers for my walks (and hopefully runs soon).  However, the sneakers I have are really bad and they're starting to hurt my feet pretty bad.  So Sunday I am going to go buy some new sneakers so I can stick to my walks without injury!  Week 3 was full of important things to learn about myself and now it's done, week 4 is about to begin.  I'm almost at the 1 month mark!  At 1 month I'm going to post a picture update (ew).  Wish me luck, here's hoping there are more ups than downs.  I can't believe it's going to be a month soon.  So far I believe that my original goal of working out everyday is really starting to become a habit!  I'm excited to see what's to come this week.  One month here I come!

Gross

So we were out and about all day and we got hungry.....

We got some McDonald's.  Gross.  I got a cheeseburger and a small french fry.  Gross.  I got some lemonade to go along with it. Gross.

Gross

Why did I get this food?  Well the kids were extra super duper good today and so we decided to treat them.  We haven't eaten any fast food in a little over a month.  So it seemed a nice treat.  Plus we've been so busy today that we just didn't have time to cook.  They enjoyed it, I feel gross.

I'm not too upset with myself about it though.  I haven't had any fast food, or fried food for that matter, in a while.  I don't think it's too big of a deal.  I definitely don't plan on doing it again for a long time.  It's gross.  After eating it I felt so gross.  It's hard to describe it.  You go a month not eating any fast food and drinking only water then you put that stuff in your body and you just feel gross, pleh, blah, and any other random word you can think of to describe the feeling, haha.

Again since I'm not focusing too greatly on my eating I'm not that upset that I did it.  I feel I shouldn't have done it but it is what it is.  I won't do it again.  The food wasn't that good, and I felt so blah after it that it's just not worth it to do it again.  It's just another bit of proof or reassurment to me that this path I'm on is truly the best path to take.  I wish I didn't waste so many years eating that junk.  Fast food is so horrible for you.  It's ok to have it every now and again in very small doses but not the way that I used to eat the stuff.  I would eat it all the time, and guess what, so would my kids.  Yet another bad habit I need to break them off.

It starts with me.  When my kids see me being active, they are active.  When my kids see me eating properly, they eat properly.  When I'm eating and drink the correct food and drink the house isn't full of junk food.  When the house isn't full of junk food my kids want to eat fruits and veggies over candy and chips.  Out of site, out of mind.  I need fix myself.  I need to make these changes.  If I can teach them the best choices are the healthy and active choices when they're young then it will stick with them their whole life.  This life change is the best change for everyone.

<----- Doesn't that look yummy?? So refreshing and my only drink of choice these days!

End of an era?

This would be me everyday, all day

I grew up without watching a lot of television.  It was a good thing and I'm very glad my parents had that rule.  Myself and my siblings spent our days reading and playing outside.  Almost a thing of the past these days....  I noticed that when we all grew up we took different paths.  Some siblings stayed away from the television, others become addicted...heck, I work in television for a living.  I watch a lot of television.  My DVR is full of shows.  Naturally my kids have picked up yet another one of my bad habits.  We wake up and turn the tv on.  We leave it on all day, we eat in front of it, we go to bed watching it.  My mother will be horrified reading this..........

Well today was the season finale of 30 Rock, a show I enjoy.  The TV station I work at was airing this show at the same time I normally take my break and go for a walk.  I honestly had it going through my head that I didn't need to go for my walk, I can just stay inside and watch my TV show.  Technically it's my rest day so I don't need to do anything active...

So I took my walk.  That's right, I said no to watching television and took a nice 1 mile walk!  Choosing exercising over watching television is another accomplishment for me.  Could it be that this bad habit of sitting around and doing nothing and watching pointless stuff on TV is over?  I gotta tell you I certainly enjoyed my walk. It appears that I can live without television. 

Benefits of walking

Walking, like other exercise, can help you achieve a number of important health benefits. Walking can help you:

So I don't look like this but it will happen!

• Lower LDL cholesterol (the "bad" cholesterol)
• Raise HDL cholesterol (the "good" cholesterol)
• Lower your blood pressure
• Reduce your risk of or manage type 2 diabetes
• Manage your weight
• Improve your mood
• Stay strong and fit

Television does absolutely none of that.  Why would you not want to take a walk instead of watching television??

Recharged

Whew boy!  It's been a week.  As I wrote before I had a rough day on Monday.  I was not in a good place mentally.  I didn't realize it until I tried working out and my body and mind would not agree with each other.  It upset me quite a bit.  I had a good long cry in the bathroom.  I haven't cried like that in a long time.  I cried because honestly I was scared.  I've tried this getting healthy thing sooo many times and my biggest downfall has always been if I stopped working out for 1 day then that was it.  That's right all it took was one day to get me off track.  This time around I'm trying so hard to stick to it.  I want it to stick so bad.  I knew that if I missed one day it would be an instant fall down that slippery slope of unhealthy habits.  I know crying like that was a bit over dramatic but hey every now and again a girl needs a good cry.

Tuesday was my "rest day".  I took a walk.  That's all I did and it was a very nice walk.  I walked to and from the school that my eldest will be going to in the fall.  My plan is to walk to and from school everyday with the kiddos.  It turned out to not be as hard as I thought it would be.  So I'm pretty excited about that.  Of course pushing a stroller with 3 kids will make it that much harder but doable.

Wednesday was back to my cardio.  I did Zumba ripped and it was awesome.  It was like a fresh start.  I kept up with it and I didn't take as many breaks as I usually needed to.  The beauty of Ripped is that right at the point you think you can't do anymore that take a tiny break.  The first part went so fast.  When I was doing Toning (the first part of workout)  I kept saying in my head "I'll just do the first half", but by the time the first half was done I didn't want to stop so I went ahead and did the second part (Sentao) of the workout.  I also walked a little over a mile during my lunch break at work.  Today was a good day.  I did all of my workout and I definately feel my body and mind are in a much better place.

It really was just a matter of taking a day off to recharge.  I didn't want to listen but my body told me otherwise.  It took my friends to point it out to me that I really needed to listen to my body.  I didn't listen and my body shut down.  Took a couple days to get back on track but I'm back and starting fresh.

I get by with a little help from my friends

Aw, I just got so teary reading this. I've felt those exact emotions before. You can do this!

My chiro talks a lot about the power the mind has over the body's ability to function smoothly.

We're you in a tough place mentally? 

That comment is from an old friend, who posted this on my Facebook wall after reading yesterday's blog post .  How wise is she?  I didn't even think about it the way she put it.  I had a really rough day yesterday and I took the fact that I couldn't complete my workout very hard.  I was so frustrated because my body literally could not do the workout.

When she mentioned that part her chyron told her about the mind and body not cooperating, it made perfect sense! I was not in a good place mentally at all yesterday when I attempted my workout.  I was struggling so hard to do the work out let alone finish it (which I didn't) that it drove me to tears.  That says a lot about where I was mentally.

It truly is amazing how "mind over matter" can really affect your everyday routine.  I went 16 straight days doing solid workouts.  I was in a good place every one of those days.  Day 17, not so much.  It was a rough day and my mind wasn't in the game.  When I gave up on my workout it made my mindset even worse.

Also, I received a phone call from my best friend after she read my blog post as well.  She is an awesome nurse and knows what she's talking about.  She gave me wonderful words of encouragement and suggested that my body was telling me I needed to rest.  So I took her advice and went to bed early.  Also today was my "rest day", which means I'm going to go walk a mile and that's about it.

So I cleansed my mind of all the negativity.  I got some rest.  I'm starting over.  Here we go!

When You're Up, you're up...

And when you're down, you're down...

Today was a bad day.  I've been so positive and making great strides in my journey but not today.  I don't know what it was but I could not finish my workout.  My calves kept cramping, my knees kept seizing, my feet kept giving out.  I've never cried so hard during a workout in my life.  Yes I was in pain.  It hurt.  In other posts I mentioned the hurt but the hurt was a good hurt.  This hurt was weighting me down.  What I was more upset about though was the fact that I couldn't keep up with my workout or even finish it.  I did about 40 minutes out of an hour long Zumba workout.  Grant it I've never been able to do the workouts all the way through but I was working on that.  I was able to take tiny little breaks then jump right back in.  I couldn't even do the belly dancing portion of the workout which has very minimal leg movements.  My legs just felt like a million pounds.

This scares me.  I've gone 16 days straight working out.  Knowing myself if I go one day without working out I will slowly start going down that slippery slope.  It will go from one day of not working out , to two days, to three, it will keep going until I am no longer working out at all.  I have a huge tendency of being lazy.  That's what has always won in any of these attempt weight loss undertakings.  I would start so strong then it would fizzle out.

After I finally gave up trying to do my workout, I shut the TV off and had a good cry in the bathroom.  It's hard to explain everything that was going through my mind.  The main thing I couldn't stop thinking about was how disappointed I am in myself.  I can't let this happen.  I have to work out everyday.  I don't even care about the weight loss at this moment.  I'm focusing on getting active.  How could I go 16 days and then poof!  I can't.  My body has been reacting very well to all the activity.  Heck read my post about energy from yesterday.

After giving up I found this quote: “Life's real failure is when you do not realize how close you were to success when you gave up.”  I read that and totally felt like crap afterwards.  I gave up after 45 minutes when honestly there might have been around 15 minutes left to the workout video.  I should have stuck with it.  Instead of being a wuss and crying in the bathroom, I should have pushed through it.  This is where the slippery slope begins.  I find a reason to stop doing what I set out to do.

I need to find my strength.  Today has been a setback but I need to make sure it doesn't effect me too much.  I cried it out.  I'm going to get some potassium in my body.  I'm going to try again tomorrow.  I'm very disappointed, but I need to somehow get over it.  It's one day.  I cannot, and I will not let it be two.  I always end my videos with my motto: "Stay Strong".  Lord, help me to follow my own advice.  Help me to find the strength to get over this hurdle and keep doing what is best for me.  Tomorrow's another day, I will get back on track.

Energized

I've been noticing a big change in me.  I've noticed more energy!  This is a wonderful thing.  I love having the energy to do things.  The kids wake me up in the morning and instead of wanting to just sit on the couch and do nothing, I'm raring to go.  This is so unusual for me.  I have always loved my sleep.  It's not as if I don't like sleeping anymore, it's that I don't need the sleep anymore.  The desire to just lie there and do nothing isn't the dominant choice.  I wake up refreshed and raring to go!  This is awesome.  My kids have noticed the change as well.  I'm pretty sure they love it.  Mom is able to give them better attention and be more active with them.

I've also noticed my skin has been clearing up.  I've been having random break outs on my face for a while now.  So far things have been calming down.  It think it definitely has to do with the lack of crap that I'm putting into my body and all the water that I consume.

My mindset in regards to food has changed as well.  Last night after work I had to stop at the store and boy was I hungry.  In the past I would buy some fast food meal, or some other kind of junk from the store, but I didn't buy a thing (outside of what I was at the store for, haha)!  Instead I bought gum and the random stuff on my list, headed home, and ate a couple pieces of cheese.  Oh yeah and I downed another 16 oz. of water...YUM!

Also, (and this I think is the biggest) I'm starting to get the itch to workout everyday.  For the last few days the urge or desire to get some kind of activity, movement, or workout done has been getting stronger and stronger.  Even on my "down days" I still have the urge to do something.  This is really pumping me up.  I'm not in the situation where I'm thinking to myself "ugh I have to workout, but I don't want to....", instead I'm thinking "hmmm...I have to be at work in 3 hours...I need to workout NOW".  This is a big deal for me.  I truly believe that it's starting to stick and that I'm really starting to enjoy being active everyday!  Yay!

This Mother's Day has been awesome.  My Mr. made me a wonderful breakfast, and he bought me an Ipod Nano to help with my workouts!  It comes with Nike+ to help monitor my progress in my workouts.  He knew how much my phone was aggravating my because it wasn't monitoring that stuff...  The kids were on their best behavior, which was awesome as well!  Also this is the first Mother's Day any of us have experienced where I woke up early and energized!  My Mother's Day gift to myself is energy.  Who needs caffeine?  Who needs those silly drinks?  Not me!  Give me some water and an active lifestyle and I'm good!

en·er·gy/ˈenərjē/

Noun:

The strength and vitality required for sustained physical or mental activity. A feeling of possessing such strength and vitality.

It's Never Too Late...

We lose our way,

We get back up again

It's never too late to get back up again,

One day you will shine again,

You may be knocked down,

But not out forever,

Lose our way,

We get back up again,

So get up, get up,

You gonna shine again,

Never too late to get back up again,

You may be knocked down,

But not out forever

Those, my friends, are wise words from Toby Mac.  I've been lost for a long time.  I've knocked myself down so many times.  I've been the cause of all of this.  I only have myself to blame.  I'm paying the price.  But it's time to get over it.  Time to move on, pick myself up, and move on. 

So we are on day 15.  Still going strong.  I'm making plans for bigger things.  For a while we were debating whether we should get a treadmill or an elipitcal.  The Mr. left it up to me to decide.  I decided on the treadmill.  I love the workout that I am currently doing: every other day Zumba and the in between days walking and yoga.  I kind of want to take it up a notch.  I want to start running again.  I've never liked running in general but I found a wonderful program called "Couch to 5k".  It's a 9 week program to help you train to run at least 3 miles.  I was doing the program about 2 years ago and I got 5 weeks into the program (which for me is amazing since I'm not a runner) but then I was blessed with another angel.  When I'm pregnant I tend to get very lazy and stop working out.  I was doing so well the last time I tried to become a runner.  I want to do it again.  So we will be getting a new treadmill soon, and I will start training. 

I know I don't need to wait to have a treadmill to start running.  I feel that it's best though.  It's very hard for me to find the time to run outside.  My Mr. works early in the morning and I work late at night.  It would not be healthy of me to wake up and try to get a run in before the Mr. goes to work.  Most days I don't get home from work until 2am, and the Mr. works as early as 6am.  This would mean I would roughly get 4 hours of sleep.  That is not healthy.  During the day I'm at home with the kids and running outside is unlikely.  Where we live is not a prime place to run outside with 3 children.  The street does not have any sidewalks and there can be a lot of traffic at times.  The traffic also tends to ignore the speed limit as well. So with that being said for the time being running indoors on a treadmill is the better option.

I've looked at a bunch of calendars for different 5k's around the area and unfortunately I'm pretty busy on the days that the big races are.  However, I did find a race that I think will be perfect for me; the 5th Annual Kelly Roggensack Memorial 5k Run.  This is a really good race.  It's at my alma mater and for a really good cause.  The race is scheduled for October 6th!  That's my goal.  I will be running in my first race ever on October 6th!  So stay tuned for updates.

It's never too late to start over again.  It's never too late to start a healthy lifestyle.  It's never too late to try something new.  It's never too late to become a better you.