And when you're down, you're down...Today was a bad day. I've been so positive and making great strides in my journey but not today. I don't know what it was but I could not finish my workout. My calves kept cramping, my knees kept seizing, my feet kept giving out. I've never cried so hard during a workout in my life. Yes I was in pain. It hurt. In other posts I mentioned the hurt but the hurt was a good hurt. This hurt was weighting me down. What I was more upset about though was the fact that I couldn't keep up with my workout or even finish it. I did about 40 minutes out of an hour long Zumba workout. Grant it I've never been able to do the workouts all the way through but I was working on that. I was able to take tiny little breaks then jump right back in. I couldn't even do the belly dancing portion of the workout which has very minimal leg movements. My legs just felt like a million pounds.
This scares me. I've gone 16 days straight working out. Knowing myself if I go one day without working out I will slowly start going down that slippery slope. It will go from one day of not working out , to two days, to three, it will keep going until I am no longer working out at all. I have a huge tendency of being lazy. That's what has always won in any of these attempt weight loss undertakings. I would start so strong then it would fizzle out.
After I finally gave up trying to do my workout, I shut the TV off and had a good cry in the bathroom. It's hard to explain everything that was going through my mind. The main thing I couldn't stop thinking about was how disappointed I am in myself. I can't let this happen. I have to work out everyday. I don't even care about the weight loss at this moment. I'm focusing on getting active. How could I go 16 days and then poof! I can't. My body has been reacting very well to all the activity. Heck read my post about energy from yesterday.
After giving up I found this quote: “Life's real failure is when you do not realize how close you were to success when you gave up.” I read that and totally felt like crap afterwards. I gave up after 45 minutes when honestly there might have been around 15 minutes left to the workout video. I should have stuck with it. Instead of being a wuss and crying in the bathroom, I should have pushed through it. This is where the slippery slope begins. I find a reason to stop doing what I set out to do.
I need to find my strength. Today has been a setback but I need to make sure it doesn't effect me too much. I cried it out. I'm going to get some potassium in my body. I'm going to try again tomorrow. I'm very disappointed, but I need to somehow get over it. It's one day. I cannot, and I will not let it be two. I always end my videos with my motto: "Stay Strong". Lord, help me to follow my own advice. Help me to find the strength to get over this hurdle and keep doing what is best for me. Tomorrow's another day, I will get back on track.
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